Jennifer Beer and Paroline Packard, 2012
The Mediator's Handbook is a textbook with mediation strategies. It is a tad specific, but definitely a cornerstone for people that want to facilitate conversations - and it changed my perspective on communication fundamentally, especially regarding difficult talks with different parties involved.
Content
The Handbookis divided in two parts. It first explain the process of initiating a mediation session. This is rather specific for people that want to work in the field - laying ground rules, seating and so on. The second part is where I took most value out of. It is a toolbox with examples on how to lead the conversation and how to find solutions together.
Part 1 Process
- Getting to the Table
- The Mediation Session Part 1: Exploring the Situation
- The Mediation Session Part 2: Reaching Resolution
Part 2 The Toolbox
- Understanding Conflict
- Supporting the People
- Faciltating the Process
- Solving the Problem
- Going Further
The toolbox part is more than a hundred pages long and it is concrete, which I enjoyed a lot. It gives you advice on wordings, remark, facilitation, structuring, intervening, guiding wording, question crafting, and so on. This entire "Toolbox" section basically details the concepts and skills a mediator needs in order to:
Understand the Conflict
Support the people
Facilitate the process
Guide decision-making.
Throughout the book, the emphasis is on what the mediator can do or say NOW, and on the underlying principles and core methods that can help the mediator make wise choices.
So there are a huge amount of practical suggestions.
So, for instance, there are several examples of emotionally difficult situations and how to focus on problem-solving. Because you as mediator can not take sides, yet, people will try to win you over.
Conclusion
I believe this should be taught in courses when becoming a team-lead in any company.
Soft Skills take some time and practice to build, thus, having such a guideline to look into from time to time and slowly adapt possible alternative approaches to improve myself, especially when having a difficult talk ahead has proved very valuable to me. Even if it was just so that I got the feeling to be prepared to face emotional and irrational accusations or illogical arguments.
A great book to learn from.
I am not affiliated, as usual, this is but a personal recommendation.
Do you have recommendations? Let me know.