Pease, Allan & Barbara (2004), The Definitive Book of Body Language, London: Orion Books Ltd
The Definitive Book of Body Language is a textbook. It is not on the light read site of the shelf, content over readability. Allan and Barbara Pease first published the book back in 2004, and it seems like an offline Wikipedia for body language.
The book is divided into 19 chapters and builds up from the basic to more complex contextual understanding. I wrote down the entire content at the bottom of the article if you are interested. They start with general perception, not body language-based, to raise awareness and then gradually go more to explicit examples, discuss interpretation and using body language in business.
They cover what you might expect, with a surprisingly large portion focusing on the business perspective, discussing territory, seatings, building rapport, using and reading accessories and how to learn to read such clusters of signals.
For each chapter, they use a mixture of explicit gestures and descriptions. For instance, chapter 11 covers thirteen common gestures that we see daily and how to think about them. One example is the leaning backwards and spreading your legs move that we love when guys do it during rush hour in public transport.
In the penultimate chapters, they address seating positions and powerplay, politics, and being in control of your emotions, which I found by far the best and most valuable part of the book.
In general, I would say that what they do is raise awareness about you becoming aware of the signals you send. And they make a fair point about signals that men & women send differently and how the perception may be more important than reading others body language per se.
In this, I see the strength and probably also the weakness of the book.
On the one hand, you become more self-aware when reading this, and a ton of little hints and tricks work really well, like the seating positions and open or attractive gestures.
On the other hand, you can become excruciatingly self-aware when you do read this book.
I do dislike that the approaches are pretty much entirely western-centric, even the section about cultural differences. These parts often seem like they are a bit outdated. And in general, women are more portrayed to focus on sexual and submissive gestures, so not really a course of body language for women, in my opinion. You might also get the feeling that male positions are superior in almost every situation, as the book is written in a way that seems to support such a point of view.
To be fair, the book states that it is the result of 30 years of their work, so it also reads a bit like a collection of various articles and works about the topic from different stages during their career. Which also might explain why you might sigh at the difficulty of finding the adequate reference at the end of the book, as they are listed alphabetically. This left the academic part of my soul to groan in desperation.
All in all, I give it a 2 out of five. There is excellent advice in the book and the ideas, approaches, and examples are well-illustrated. The sections about seating, powerplay and cluster and so on are very well written and informative. Thus, I think it is definitely worth to have that overview and that is why I have it in the book store section.
There are some bits here and there that are outdated. To say the least. For instance, one section states that German and British people are disciplined and mirror people more than other cultures: That is why they dominated the world for many years (chapter 12). I had to laugh at that. What would that make Swiss and Japanese people? Do we secretly dominate the world? I guess. There are newer versions coming out every now and then, I am sure they keep reworking the book and take out blunders like these.
I wrote down the entire content list for you, have a look what they talk about.
Introduction
All Things Are Not What They Seem
How Well Do You Know the Back of Your Hand?
How Well Can You Spot Body Language Contradictions? How We Wrote This Book
Your Body Language Dictionary
1. Understanding the Basics
In the Beginning ...
Why It's Not What You Say
How Body Language Reveals Emotions and Thoughts Why Women are More Perceptive
What Brain Scans Show
How Fortune-Tellers Know So Much
Inborn, Genetic or Learned Culturally?
Some Basic Origins
Universal Gestures
Three Rules for Accurate Reading
Why It Can be Easy to Misread
Why Kids are Easier to Read
Can You Fake it?
True-Life Story: The Lying Job Applicant
How to Become a Great Reader
2. The Power Is in Your Hands
How to Detect Openness
Intentional Use of the Palms to Deceive
The Definitive Book of Body Language
The Law of Cause and Effect Palm Power Our Audience Experiment
An Analysis of Handshake Styles
Who Should Reach First?
How Dominance and Control Are Communicated The Submissive Handshake
How to Create Equality
How to Create Rapport
How to Disarm a Power Player
The Cold, Clammy Handshake Gaining the Left Side Advantage When Men and Women Shake Hands The Double-Hander
The Blair—Bush Power Game
The Solution
The World's Eight Worst Handshakes The Arafat-Rabin Handshake Summary
3. The Magic of Smiles and Laughter
Smiling Is a Submission Signal Why Smiling Is Contagious How a Smile Tricks the Brain Practising the Fake Smile Smugglers Smile Less
Five Common Types of Smiles
Why Laughter Is the Best Medicine
Why You Should Take Laughter Seriously Why We Laugh and Talk, But Chimps Don't How Humour Heals
Laughing Till You Cry
How Jokes Work
The Laughter Room
Smiles and Laughter Are a Way of Bonding Humour Sells
The Permanent Down-Mouth
VI
Smiling Advice For Women Laughter In Love
Summary
4. Arm Signals
Arm Barrier Signals
Why Crossed Arms Can be Detrimental Yes...But I'm Just 'Comfortable' Gender Differences Crossed-Arms-on-Chest
Solution
Reinforced Arm-Crossing Arm-Gripping
The Boss vs The Staff Getting the Thumbs-Up Hugging Yourself
How the Rich and Famous Reveal their Insecurity The Coffee Cup Barrier
The Power of Touch
Touch their Hand Too
Summary
5. Cultural Differences
We Were Having Pizza at the Time
Take the Cultural Test
Why We're All Becoming American
Cultural Basics are the Same Almost Everywhere Greeting Differences
When One Culture Encounters Another
The English Stiff-Upper-Lip
The Japanese
'You Dirty, Disgusting Pig!' - Nose Blowing
The Three Most Common Cross-Cultural Gestures To Touch or Not to Touch?
How to Offend Other Cultures Summary
Contents
VII
The Definitive Book of Body Language
6. Hand and Thumb Gestures
How the Hands Talk
On the One Hand...
On the Other Hand, Gestures Improve Recall Rubbing the Palms Together
Thumb and Finger Rub
Hands Clenched Together
The Steeple
Summary
The Face Platter
Holding Hands Behind the Back
Thumb Displays Thumbs-Protruding-from-Coat-Pocket Summary
7. Evaluation and Deceit Signals
Lying Research
The Three Wise Monkeys
How the Face Reveals the Truth
Women Lie the Best and That's the Truth Why It's Hard to Lie
Eight of the Most Common Lying Gestures Evaluation and Procrastination Gestures The Lying Interviewee
Chin Stroking
Stalling Clusters
Head Rubbing and Slapping Gestures
Why Bob Always Lost at Chess
The Double Meaning
8. Eye Signals
The Dilating Pupils
Take the Pupil Test
Women Are Better at It, as Usual Giving Them the Eye
The Eyebrow Flash
VIII
Eye Widening
The 'Looking Up' Cluster
How Men's Fires Get Lit
Gaze Behaviour - Where Do You Look?
How to Keep Eye Contact in a Nudist Colony How to Grab a Man's Attention
Most Liars Look You in the Eye
How to Avoid being Attacked or Abused
The Sideways Glance
Extended Blinking
Darting Eyes
The Geography of the Face
The Politician's Story
Look Deep Into My Eyes, Baby
The First 20 Seconds of an Interview
What Channel Are You Tuned to?
How to Hold Eye Contact with an Audience How to Present Visual Information
The Power Lift
Summary
9. Space Invaders - Territories and Personal Space
Personal Space
Zone Distances
Practical Applications of Zone Distances Who Is Moving In on Whom?
Why We Hate Riding in Lifts
Why Mobs Become Angry
Spacing Rituals
Try the Luncheon Test
Cultural Factors Affecting Zone Distances Why Japanese Always Lead When They Waltz Country vs. City Spatial Zones
Territory and Ownership
Car Territory
Take the Test
Summary
Contents
IX
The Definitive Book of Body Language
10. How the Legs Reveal What the Mind Wants to Do
Everybody's Talking About a New Way of Walking How Feet Tell the Truth
The Purpose of the Legs
The Four Main Standing Positions
Defensive, Cold or 'Just Comfortable'? How We Move from Closed to Open The European Leg Cross
The American Figure Four
When the Body Closes, so Does the Mind Figure Four Leg Clamp
The Ankle Lock
The Short Skirt Syndrome
The Leg Twine
Parallel-Legs
Put Your Right Foot In, Put Your Right Foot Out Summary
11. The 13 Most Common Gestures You'll See Daily
The Head Nod
Why You Should Learn to Nod
How to Encourage Agreement
The Head Shake
The Basic Head Positions
The Head Shrug
Picking Imaginary Lint
How We Show We're Ready for Action
The Cowboy Stance
Sizing Up the Competition
The Legs-Spread
Leg-Over-the-Arm-of-Chair
Straddling a Chair
The Catapult
Gestures That Show When a Person is Ready The Starter's Position
Summary
12. Mirroring - How We Build Rapport
Creating the Right Vibes
Mirroring on a Cellular Level
Mirroring Differences Between Men and Women What to Do About It if You're Female
When Men and Women Start to Look Alike
Do We Resemble Our Pets?
Monkey See, Monkey Do
Matching Voices
Intentionally Creating Rapport
Who Mirrors Whom?
Summary
13. The Secret Signals of Cigarettes, Glasses and Make-up
The Two Types of Smokers
Differences Between Men and Women Smoking as a Sexual Display
How to Spot a Positive or Negative Decision Cigar Smokers
How Smokers End a Session
How to Read Glasses
Stalling Tactics
Peering-Over-the-Glasses
Wearing Glasses on the Head
The Power of Glasses and Make-up
A Little Lippy, Lady?
Briefcase Signals
Summary
14. How the Body Points to Where the Mind Wants to Go 279
What Body Angles Say How We Exclude Others Seated Body Pointing Foot Pointing
Summary
Contents
XI
The Definitive Book of Body Language
15. Courtship Displays and Attraction Gestures
The Emergence of the Colourful Male Graham's Story
Why Women Always Call the Shots Differences Between Men and Women The Attraction Process
The 13 Most Common Female Courtship Gestures and Signals
How Beautiful People Miss Out
What Men Look At in Women's Bodies
Is He a Bum, Boobs or Leg Man?
Male Courtship Signals and Gestures
Men's Bodies - What Turns Women On the Most Is She a Chest, Legs or Bum Gal?
Summary
16. Ownership, Territory and Height Signals
Body Lowering and Status
He's a Big Man Around Town
Why Some People Seem Taller on TV Try the Floor Test
Body Lowering and Status
He's a Big Man Around Town
Why Some People Seem Taller on TV Try the Floor Test
The Downsides of Height
How Body Lowering Can Sometimes Raise Status How TV Politicians Can Win Votes
How to Placate Angry People
What's Love Got To Do With It?
Some Strategies For Gaining Perceived Height Summary
17. Seating Arrangements - Where to Sit and Why
Take the Table Test
It's Not What You Say, It's Where You Sit
XII
King Arthur's Concept
Keeping Two People Involved Rectangular Board Tables
Why Teacher's Pet Sits On the Left
Power Plays at Home
How to Make an Audience Cry The Attention Zone
An Experiment in Learning Getting a Decision Over Dinner Summary
18. Interviews, Power Plays and Office Politics
Why James Bond Looked Cool, Calm and Collected
The Nine Golden Keys to Making Great First Impressions When Someone Keeps You Waiting
Fake It Till You Make It?
Seven Simple Strategies for Giving You the Extra Edge Summary
Office Power Politics
How to Switch Table Territories
Seated Body Pointing
How to Re-arrange an Office Summary
19. Putting It All Together
How Well Can You Read Between the Lines? How Did You Rate?
Summary
The Six Secrets of Attractive Body Language